#BUT STILL 3 FICTIONAL CRUSHES IN THE SAME YEAR. WHATS HAPPENING.
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I need Dragon King, Dr. Neo Cortex AND Queen Ravenzella to marry me. We'd make the most goofy evil polycule ever and im all in for it
#im on a roll today#kind of#BUT STILL 3 FICTIONAL CRUSHES IN THE SAME YEAR. WHATS HAPPENING.#comet rambles#comet please shut the fuck up#I WANT CORTEX ESPECIALLY IM NUTS FOR THIS MAN I WANT HIM I WANT HIM I WANT HIM AAAAGHHHHHH <3333#THE FLAMBOYANT SILLY EVIL POLYCULE LETS GOOOOO#btw queen ravenzella is from the new netflix series unicorn academy and dragon king is from the netflix monkey king movie.
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Philophobia
Word Count: 5,271 Warnings: Shipping, inappropriate/crude humor, paranormal activity, suspense/mild horror, descriptive kissing, mild language Summary: For architecture major and paranormal skeptic Grian, his friends’ after-hours ghost hunting group was just an excuse to spend time with his crush, Scar, without having to actually ask him out. But one fateful night, he finds there just might be things in this world that are scarier than emotional vulnerability… even if only by a very slim margin.
A/N: Did someone ask for a Phasmophobia-inspired Scarian au? Oh yeah, my friend @lunarcrown did! Inspired by the art she made here.
So this is kind of a modern-day college au (not set within the fictional universe of Minecraft), howEVER there are some fantasy aspects in that non-human species (like mob hybrids/monsters) still exist cuz they’re fun and I’m not giving anyone a normal modern name cuz that’s too weird. This is only Phasmophobia-inspired in that GIGS have a ghost-hunting group that functions the same way, but rarely find any conclusive evidence, and don’t have unlimited lives cuz they aren’t playing a game. With that out of the way, hope y’all enjoy, please reblog/comment if u do! - Aqua
~*~
Philophobia
~*~
“I think this is gonna be the one, guys,” Impulse says, turning their van into the driveway.
The suspension creaks as they roll over gravel, rattling the frame in a way that hums through Grian’s hollow bones. His arm is cold where it presses against the window; it’s almost sunset and Impulse has yet to get the van’s heater fixed despite his promises. Stupid demon blood keeping him warm while Grian shivers in the stupid custom pleather jumpsuit that Scar insisted they had made, for their stupid ‘brand’ as a stupid ghost-hunting group. Great, his stupid zipper’s come down again- he stubbornly zips it back up because unlike Scar, he doesn’t like constantly having his bare chest out on display.
Of course, he hasn’t got as much to show off as Scar, who must be getting up at 3 am every morning to work out in order to maintain all that muscle. No wonder Scar prefers to keep his zipper down to his belly button, and doesn’t seem to have ever met a shirt that fits him properly.
… Not that Grian’s ever paid much attention to that sort of thing.
Grian gives an exasperated sigh. “You’ve been saying that about every case we’ve had for three years!”
“No, no, I really mean it!” Impulse insists. “I feel it in my bones.”
“Yeah,” Scar agrees, leaning forward so his shoulder brushes against Grian’s, “you know Impulse bones good!”
The earnest nature of his statement- and the unexpected physical contact- makes Grian flush. “Scar!” he shrieks, swatting Scar’s shoulder.
“What?” Scar defends. “What, he- he’s got big and strong bones, wonderful bones…”
He acts as if he’s got no idea he said something that could be taken the wrong way. And if it weren’t for the upturned corners of his mouth and the barely-restrained laugh in his voice, Grian might actually believe him.
“Dude,” Skizz chuckles from the front seat, “shut up, that’s awesome.”
Impulse sighs. “Anyway,” he says pointedly, “the place recently had a change in ownership. Previous owner passed away-”
“From murder?” Scar gasps.
Another sigh. “No, from liver failure.”
Grian snorts. “From all the drinking he did to forget about the ghostly hauntings?” he presses, exchanging a cheeky grin with Scar.
“No,” Impulse says, with the patience of a saint, “just normal old-age organ failure. The guy was ancient, and some kinda recluse. House had been in his family since it was built, but uh, he had no living relatives, no will when he died. So the bank took ownership and it’s been sitting off-market for like, fifteen years, til some hot-shot investor thought he could flip it-”
“Ughh,” Grian groans, tipping his head back against the seat. “Investors are the worst-”
“I know, I know,” Impulse soothes, “but um, he’d barely begun when things started happening. Contractors reported it day one, then the owner experienced an event himself and called us. So it’s basically still untouched.”
They haven’t even reached the end of the driveway yet, passing by seemingly endless rows of tall, gnarled pines. Admittedly, Grian’s curiosity is piqued. When he agreed to join this stupid ghost hunting group three years ago, he didn’t do so in the hopes of actually discovering any real paranormal activity. The whole idea is laughable. Ghost hunting is a pseudoscience, at best. Just a bunch of idiots scaring themselves silly in an empty house- and now they’re the idiots! Even their name is stupid: Ghost Investigation Group Services, or GIGS, embroidered on their ill-fitting pleather jumpsuits.
But despite his outright skepticism and dislike for pulling late nights in his already extremely limited free time, Grian’s got one very good reason for agreeing to join.
And his name is Scar.
Grian spent half a semester pining away at the fellow architecture major from across the lecture halls of their many shared classes. Charismatic and easy on the eyes, it was inevitable that Grian would develop a bit of a crush. But as they spent more time together during class projects and conversations in the hallway, he found out just how kind-hearted and passionate Scar was, and how easy he was to talk to, and how strong his arms looked in long-sleeved shirts…
… Yeah, ‘crush’ perhaps isn’t the right word.
So when Impulse- the engineering major who Grian was partnered with for physics lab- got the brilliant idea to start a ghost-hunting group with his best friend and roommate Skizz, and Scar expressed interest in joining, Grian made a split-second decision in a moment of weakness. He maintained his skepticism, claiming that he wanted to tag along just to prove how silly the whole idea was. Impulse was fine with it, while Scar said Grian had to wear the same uniform as them, and the rest was history.
(To be fair, that was before Grian knew it’d be a pleather jumpsuit.)
So here they are now nearly three years later, rumbling down a long gravel road in the dark and cold, up late on a Saturday night even though he still isn’t finished with his condominium model that’s due at 8 am on Monday and he’s fresh out of popsicle sticks. Moments like these almost make Grian wish he could just ask a guy out like a normal person, so they could spend time together without chasing pretend ghosts around dusty houses all night.
But that’d require him to talk about his feelings. Ugh, he’d rather let the ghosts get him.
“Alright.” Impulse slows the van to a halt. The doors unlock with a heavy clunk. “What do you guys think?”
Grian isn’t expecting much when he glances out the window. But the sight that greets him immediately prompts a hasty exit from the vehicle, scarcely noticing the sudden chill, his jaw dropping open in awe.
It’s a Victorian. Not a house that someone has mistakenly called ‘Victorian’ just because it looks old. A genuine, honest-to-goodness, Queen Anne’s style two-story Victorian manor with an asymmetrical facade and a rounded corner tower and a generous wrap-around porch, silhouetted against the fading light of the evening sky.
Grian reaches for his flashlight. Sweeping over the exterior, his breath catches. Knots of ivy creep up the walls, and there are a few places where the intricate wood trim has been lost to previous repairs and weather damage. A couple of the windows are bricked up. Most of the paint is faded and peeling. But overall? It’s beautiful.
“Oh man,” Grian murmurs, pushing his glasses back up, “look at the shape of it... look at the dormers!”
A second beam of light joins in; Scar’s emerged from the van. “Lots of character,” he says, sounding similarly entranced. “And still in great condition! Oh, it’s beautiful. It’s enough to make a man cry.”
Impulse hops out of the driver’s seat, chuckling. “I knew you two would like it. It’s an ‘85.”
Grian gives an appreciative whistle. “Look, I still don’t think we’re gonna find anythin’,” he says with a sideways look at Scar, “but I gotta tell ya… if- if I were a ghost… I think I’d haunt a proper house like this. Not those builder-grade boxes in the suburbs.”
“Right?” Impulse says, his forked tail flicking through the air. “That’s what I’m sayin’... I uh, I think this place has real potential.”
Skizz, who’s come around the van to stand with them, nods thoughtfully. “Definitely somethin’ special ‘bout it, that’s for true,” he says, exchanging a look with Impulse. Then he claps his hands together. “Alright gentlemen, let’s get movin’!”
Impulse and Skizz turn towards the van, heading to open the back.
Grian stares after them, squinting suspiciously. That wasn’t just any look. That was a Look. A Look that he knows all too well. They had that same Look on their faces at last year’s frat mixer, when they rigged the speakers at the Heta Kappa house to play ‘Margaritaville’ every time someone flushed a toilet.
It means that they’re Up To Something.
… Grian’s sure he’ll find out sooner or later.
“Well, Grian,” Scar says, hands on his hips as he surveys the property, “if it’s any connotation, at least we’ll get to study some real architecture tonight.”
Grian gives him a bemused look. “Consolation?”
Scar blinks. “Cono- what, what’d I say? Con- coronation?”
“Don’t worry ‘bout it, ey,” Grian chuckles, patting him on the shoulder. “Let’s go.”
~*~
“Check it out, dude,” Skizz calls excitedly, “temp’s dropping in here! Five degrees colder than the rest of the house!”
Grian makes a noncommittal noise. “It’s an east-facing room and the sun’s only just set, of course it’s colder than the rest of the house,” he says, idly passing his UV glow stick over an armchair. No prints, of course. “I doubt they’ve updated the insulation anytime within the last two decades.”
“And hey, look,” Impulse chimes in from the corner, “I’ve got EMF 1.3!”
Grian doesn’t even look up. “There’s an exposed outlet in here and I’ll bet the wiring’s older than I am. And in any case, it’s still below the recommended threshold.” Ew, okay, now that’s a suspicious UV stain on the floor, but not of the supernatural kind…
“Oh, it’s definitely not up to code,” Impulse agrees. He waves his EMF reader around a bit, making the pitch warble. “But I dunno, I think this must be the ghost’s favorite room. Might not be here right now, but I’m getting some real vibes…”
Grian rolls his eyes. “Sure…”
Twenty minutes in, and despite the house’s hauntingly elegant construction, it’s been the same old story. The house is empty and quiet, as abandoned houses tend to be. Quite sparse, as most of the furnishings probably went to auction. The furniture that’s left is covered with tarps and every surface is coated with a fine layer of dust. He can smell mold somewhere in the floorboards and there’s apparent water damage in the ceiling.
The only renovation attempted thus far was the removal of some cheap linoleum tiles that were laid in the kitchen at some point- a renovation Grian can heartily agree with, there’s some absolutely gorgeous hardwood underneath- but they didn’t get far. The removed tiles are still sitting about in a haphazard pile, hammer and chisel abandoned on the floor beside them. Frantic footsteps smeared in the dust and powder paint the scene of a terrified contractor fleeing for their life from the reported ‘ghostly hauntings’.
In any case, they haven’t heard any activity from the spirit box, nothing unusual has stood out on UV, and the salt Impulse laid out is still undisturbed. Surprise, surprise. Grian’s spent most of his time admiring the elaborate wooden trims lining every wall, scuffed as they are. What he wouldn’t give to properly restore this place…
“Hey, Dipple Dop?” Skizz calls suddenly. “Your radio working okay?”
Impulse gives him a curious look. “Huh? What, is there-” He pauses, glancing down at his radio. “Oh. Oh, yeah. Yeah, actually, mine’s on the fritz, must be overdue a battery change.”
“Oh?” Grian tilts his head innocently. “You don’t think it’s a ghoooost?”
Impulse purses his lips. “I don’t think everything is a ghost,” he says mildly. He clips the radio onto his belt, turning to the door. “I’ve got extras in the van, hang on…”
“I’ll go, too,” Skizz says quickly, slinging an arm and his wing around Impulse’s shoulders. “Buddy system! You know what, I- I’m tellin’ you, you never split up when hunting ghosts. That’s how they get you, dude.”
Oh. Oh, no.
Grian gives them a warning Look.
They give him a cheeky Look back.
“Yup, yeah, that’s true,” Impulse says with obvious feigned sincerity, steering Skizz out of the room. “So uh, you two keep at it, okay, and we’ll be right back…”
“Oh, okay!” Scar says cheerfully, busy setting up the tripod over in the corner and completely oblivious to their scheme. “Have a great time not getting murdered!”
Grian opens his mouth to protest, but Impulse and Skizz are already gone out the front door. Leaving him and Scar completely alone. Totally by coincidence, surely. Oh, he knew his drunken confession to Impulse at the school’s annual bar crawl fundraiser night would come back to bite him eventually.
It’s almost insulting, in a way. Like they think the only reason Grian hasn’t made a move is because he hasn’t had ample alone time with Scar. Like he needed them to give him an opportunity. But if he’d wanted to confess to Scar, he already would have. He’d have had it well done by now. They could give him a little credit.
See, the thing is, he’s thought about it. Plenty of times, in fact. But the issue he keeps coming back to is that if he tells Scar about his crush on him, then Scar will know about it. There’ll be no going back at that point. And if Scar doesn’t feel the same way- well, Grian can kiss their friendship goodbye. So yeah, no, he doesn’t think he’ll be making any dramatic love confessions tonight, strangely enough.
The risk of an awkward silence developing is astronomical, so Grian clears his throat. “Man… isn’t this place somethin’,” he says, then immediately fights the urge to cringe.
Scar, luckily, gives an emphatic nod. “It is, it truly is amazing.” He straightens up, dusting his hands off as he turns to Grian. “You know who’d really love this place, is Gem?”
“Oh, yeah, for sure,” Grian agrees. He busies himself with the UV, so he’s not just standing around. “We should take some pictures for her.”
“Oh, good idea!” Giving the tripod a final once-over, Scar wanders over to Grian. “So, any fingering goin’ on, yet?”
Grian nearly drops his glow stick. “Sorry- any what?!” he screeches, whirling around on Scar.
“You know, ghost fingers!” Scar says, perfectly innocent. He holds his hands up, wiggling his fingers in demonstration. “On the- on the glowy light?”
Grian takes a deep breath, face burning. “Oh Scar, buddy, you gotta think through your words better before you say them, alright?”
“Whaaat?” Scar pretends like he doesn’t know. “What, I’m just- you’ve got the stick, you know, little glow stick for when the ghost touches, uh-”
“Nevermind,” Grian groans. “Anyways, no, I haven’t found any ghostly handprints and I never will, because ghosts aren’t real.”
Scar folds his arms. “Well, hey, maybe the ghost is just polite! You know, he- maybe he’s just minding his business, not touching anything or- or anyone. Just because we don’t get anything on UV doesn’t mean ghosts aren’t real, I’ll have you know.”
Grian sees the challenge for what it is. “Alright…” He reaches into his pocket and pulls out his spirit box. Holding the transponder to his lips, he belts out, “Where ahhre yewww?” in his best imitation of an over-exaggerated pop-punk accent. If Impulse and Skizz are eavesdropping through their radios, he hopes he gave them a start.
Scar laughs. “Oh man, been a while since I heard that one! You-”
I’m close.
Grian jumps so badly he nearly drops the box, his wings puffing out involuntarily. “What?! Wha- who said that?” he demands, spinning around.
Scar blinks at him. “What? Did you hear something through the box?”
“I- I dunno?” Grian says uncertainly. The box seems to be working as normal; when he holds the receiver down, there’s a faint hiss of static, and the bulb remains white. No further noises come from the speaker.
After a couple seconds of tense listening, Grian feels silly. Way to play it cool. He switches the box off with an exasperated sigh. “No, of course I didn’t hear anything through the box. Like I said, ghosts aren’t real.”
Scar hums noncommittally. “Oh, Grian... you know, there are some things in the world that can’t be explained.”
Grian snorts. “Oh, yeah? Well, I- I got a few explanations for ya.” He counts on his fingers. “It could’ve been this old house creaking in the wind, or an electrical surge causing feedback through the transponder, or- or, not to mention, Impulse and Skizz pranking us through the radio?”
Scar snickers. “That does sound like something they’d do, I’ll give you that.”
“Yeah.” Grian slips the box back into his pocket. “And y’know, being in a creepy abandoned house, after dark, out in the middle’a nowhere... it’s easy to think you’re hearin’ things.”
Scar rolls his eyes, but his expression is fond. “I know, I know, so you’ve told me. But one of these days, mister, you’re gonna eat your words.”
“Right,” Grian drawls. “I’m so scared…”
The front door slams shut.
That makes Grian pause. They always leave the front door open while out on a job. It saves time when they have to go back and forth from the van, and saves battery life on their radios when they can just shout to each other through the open doorway. Obviously this job is a little different, because Impulse and Skizz have clearly got it in their heads to try and get him and Scar together, but he wouldn’t think they’d go so far as to-
The lights suddenly flicker and go out. But in the split-second before they do, Grian sees a shadowy figure silhouetted against the door.
Pure instinct takes over. Grian spins on his heel, grabs Scar by the arm, and absolutely flies down the stairs to the basement. He knows they’ve disturbed one or two piles of salt but right now, he can’t bring himself to care. His wings are bumping against the walls and he’s certainly never tried carrying someone as big as Scar before but he doesn’t stop, doesn’t even process the ache of it rattling through his body. He bursts into the basement, feathers flying, and careens towards the back of the room, around a tall shelving unit, and into the corner.
There’s a heap of boxes stacked up in this corner; Grian unceremoniously shoves Scar over top of them, dropping him in the narrow space between the boxes and the wall. He’s wedged in as far as he can himself, laying across the boxes, his double pair of wings preventing him from squeezing in beside Scar. He’s still got the UV light clenched in his fist, he realizes belatedly- he braces his forearms against the wall to try and cover it, fanning his wings out behind him to block it out from the rest of the room. Glancing back over his shoulder, he tries to gauge how much light is getting through when a noise makes him freeze.
Footsteps.
They’re soft and light- certainly not the heavy boots of Impulse or Skizz. No, they sound almost barefoot. And as they gently tap down the stairs, the sound of giggling fills the air. It’s a feminine voice. Young, like a child. Like a little ghostie girl is prancing down the stairs to murder them.
Grian thinks he might pass out. Can ghosts actually kill people? How would they do it if they’re incorporeal? He’s never considered the question before, he never thought he’d have to because it’s ridiculous, ghosts aren’t real, of course they can’t kill people-
The footsteps stop.
Grian isn’t sure if he’s still breathing. He doesn’t dare move. A chill runs up his spine, making every single feather stand on end. He can almost hear the high-pitched violins that would be playing right now if this were a horror movie; the cheesy, overdrawn kind of horror movies that are always playing at the drive-in that the four of them watch while piled into the back of the van in a tangle of limbs and spilled popcorn and oh god he’s spiraling now because he’s about to be killed by a ghost-
Bye-bye!
The chill recedes. Somewhere in his peripheral vision, he sees the faint glow of light from upstairs return.
It’s over.
Grian’s mind is spinning. What was that? What was that? It seems impossible, it doesn’t even feel real to be in this situation right now but he is, there was a ghost, there was a ghost. It feels insane to even think it. But the residual adrenaline coursing through his body reminds him it was very real, he just encountered a ghost.
A ghost! Oh, after three years of very loudly decrying the entire concept as rubbish. He can’t believe it. He really can’t believe it, this is the absolute last thing he expected to happen tonight. Ghosts are real. Ghosts are really, really, real. He doesn’t know what to do, who would ever believe him? Is this how the others have been feeling this whole time? God, he can’t believe this-
“G...?” Scar’s voice pipes up hesitantly. “What... what are we doing?”
Oh, right. Grian glances down at Scar- and his heart jolts. He’d been so focused on getting away from the ghost, he’d acted without thinking, so only now does he realize the... predicament he’s put them in.
Scar’s slumped against the floor beneath him, head tucked just below Grian’s arms. His long legs are still draped over the box that Grian’s laying across, resting on either side of his waist. And due to the odd posture Grian’s in, his chest has been thrust rather close to Scar’s face, lit by the soft purple glow of the UV.
This is probably the closest Grian has ever been to sitting in Scar’s lap.
Grian’s not proud of the yelp that escapes him. “Sorry, sorry!” His wings flail as he struggles to push himself off of the wall, stumbling back onto his feet. It’s clumsy and uncoordinated and he nearly falls backwards, his heart pounding.
Scar manages a laugh, easing himself up off the floor. “No, no, it’s okay, I- I just... what- why’d you bring us down here?” he asks, dusting off his jumpsuit.
Grian catches his breath. “Wait, you... didn’t hear the creepy ghost on its way to kill us?” he asks, frowning.
Scar‘s eyes widen. “What? There was a ghost?”
No way.
“Are you-!” Grian throws his arms up. “Honestly, I- I know avians have better hearing than most but that’s insane. She was laughing! Laughing and skipping down the blumin’ steps! And you didn’t hear any of it?”
“No…?” Scar shrugs helplessly. “I’m sorry, okay! I- I don’t know, I was- a lot was happening, you- you’re grabbin’ me, pulling me down the stairs and into this little corner, I didn’t know what was going on! I didn’t know, I- I was all disconbodulated- disco- bobo, bobumated? I was a little distracted, okay. Jeeze, give a man a break…”
“Distracted?” Grian repeats incredulously. “You’re the one who actually believes in ghosts, here, how could you get distracted? What do you…”
He trails off. Scar is very clearly fighting to avoid looking at Grian, but for the briefest moment, his eyes dart down to Grian’s chest. Suddenly confused, Grian follows his gaze, and-
Oh, for goodness sakes. At some point during his frantic flight, the stupid zipper on his stupid jumpsuit came down again, exposing a frankly scandalous amount of skin. Not Scar-level of scandalous, but pretty close.
Grian immediately feels himself turn red. “Oh. Uh- right,” he hastily pulls the zipper back up, “sorry ‘bout that…”
Wait. Wait just a second.
Scar was distracted from a literal ghost hunt going on... because Grian’s bare chest was showing? Does that... does that mean he liked it?
Scar’s avoiding his gaze again. His cheeks are tinted pink.
“Scar...?” Grian ventures carefully. “Were you... lookin’ at my chest?”
Scar’s cheeks darken. “Ah, I- I- don’t- I mean, why would you- I didn’t mean to, it’s just...” He fumbles for the words. “What- what am I- hey, your pecs were basically in my face! I wasn’t trying to look, I- I just-”
“Scar,” Grian says, keeping his voice light and teasing, “did ya… did you like what you saw?”
Scar splutters for a moment. “Well, sure, Grian,” he tries to laugh it off, “I mean, anyone- anyone with eyes can see you’re uh, you know, you’re- you’re pretty attractive. I- I’m secure enough to say it, I don’t care, it’s- sure, of course, you’re very muscular! You’re a- you’re a muscular man, it’s just not always obvious with the sweaters you wear. Or- sorry, you call them jumpers in Britain land, right, they’re jumpers-”
“You been checkin’ me out, Scar?” Grian asks, caught somewhere between playfulness and utter disbelief.
“Uh...” Scar rubs the back of his neck. He exhales slowly, clearly debating with himself. “I... maybe? What... what would you say... if that were the case?”
Grian swallows. His heart is absolutely racing now, and he’s broken into a cold sweat that’s definitely not supernatural in origin. The air between them feels fragile; he’s acutely aware that a single word from him could swiftly plunge them back into the realm of safe familiarity, of casual light-hearted teasing between friends. Scar’s always said things that bordered on the flirtatious, and Grian can hide behind the plausible deniability of teasing. This entire interaction doesn’t have to mean anything. It can be easily moved past and forgotten.
And yet, strangely enough… Grian doesn’t want it to. Maybe it’s the post-haunting adrenaline or the fact that he could’ve died tonight, but all of a sudden, he feels like taking a chance. Like he could finally say what he’s wanted to say for the last three years. He managed to hold his own against a blumin’ ghost, for goodness sakes- he should be able to face his own feelings head on.
He takes a breath. “I’d say that’s a relief… ‘cause I’ve been checkin’ you out since day one of first year.”
Scar stares at him for a long moment. His expression is utterly unreadable. The silence draws on long enough that Grian feels a spike of panic, worried that maybe he’s mishandled the situation-
“... oh my god,” Scar says finally. “Really?”
It sounds like the good kind of surprise. Grian offers a shy smile. “Yeah, yeah,” he admits. “I- Scar, I know I’m real good at playin’ these things close to the vest, but uh, I- I’ve had a massive crush on you since... basically since the day we met.”
“Huh.” Scar blinks. “You’re serious. You- you’re not pranking me right now?”
That startles a laugh out of Grian. “No! Scar, I don’t- we just survived being hunted by a ghost, I’m not pranking you!”
“Well, that’s- that’s amazing!” A grin spreads across Scar’s face- and man, oh man, does he have just the most wonderful smile. “Oh my gosh, G, I don’t- you don’t even know how long I’ve been waiting for this.”
The relief is almost overwhelming. “Yeah, me too!” Grian laughs, half-dazed and half-giddy, running a hand through his hair. “I- I even- look, the whole reason I even joined this group was as an excuse to hang out with you!”
Scar’s mouth falls open. “No way! That’s- that’s the whole reason I joined in the first place, too!”
Now it’s Grian’s turn to gawk. “Are you joking?”
“I’m not!” Scar insists, “I swear, I’m not- Impulse said he wanted to start the group and maybe we’d all join and get to hang out and I thought ‘hey, ghosts are cool and Grian is cool’ so I just-”
“Oh, I can’t believe this…” Grian groans, hiding his burning face in his hands. “We really are idiots, we’ve wasted nearly three years…”
Scar’s hands close around Grian’s wrists, lightly pulling them down from his face. “Well, I guess we’ll just have to make up for lost time,” he says smoothly, leaning in.
Corny, but Grian will allow it. He closes the gap, tilting his head up to meet Scar’s lips.
In that moment, everything else fades away. All the nervousness, all the second-guessing, even the bombshell discovery of the existence of ghosts- there could be one standing in front of them right now and Grian wouldn’t care. The way Scar gathers Grian in his arms, hands gently roving through his feathers- it’s bliss. It’s perfect.
Scar kisses him strong and purposefully, with no trace of carelessness or haste. He doesn’t rush. There’s intent written into every single movement, jaw working to deepen the kiss. Grian curls against him, hands splayed across Scar’s chest. He can feel Scar’s heart pounding through his flushed skin, and it’s wildly exciting- to think Scar is just as breathless as he is.
Growing bold, Grian dares to slip his tongue into Scar’s mouth, and the noise he makes- part surprise, part delight- sends pure electricity fizzling up his spine. His mind is starting to drift away from him, lost in the sensation of weightlessness, of floating, that almost makes him feel like he’s gone completely incorporeal- like his own spirit has become untethered from the mortal coil.
Then Skizz’s voice comes down the stairs.
“G-Sharp! Scarface! You down here? We just saw a freaking ghost on the cams, and- oh my god!”
Grian breaks away from Scar, but not quick enough. He turns to see Skizz and Impulse standing at the bottom of the stairs, expressions shocked. And then, as if they’d rehearsed it, they both break into massive shit-eating grins and spin around to high-five each other.
“Woo!” Impulse cheers. “We got ‘em! Ladies and gentlemen, we finally got them.”
“Yeah, baby!” Skizz pumps his fist in the air. “Oh, I love it!”
“Oh, would you two stop it?” Grian huffs, but he’s not really cross. Hard to be cross when he’s on cloud nine. “The ghost did most of the work, alright?”
“That’s right,” Scar sniffs, winding an arm around Grian’s waist. “You know, I- I’m startin’ to think you all were in cahoots! Cahoots, I say!”
“Dude, if only,” Skizz laughs, walking over to clap them on the shoulders. “Could not have planned it better, that’s amazing. Well done, gentlemen!”
“Yeah, it’s about time!” Impulse adds, crossing his arms. “I was starting to think we’d graduate before either of you fessed up, I- I had to take drastic measures…”
“Impulse,” Grian says warningly, “if you’re about to tell me you started this whole paranormal investigation group just as a way to push me and Scar into confronting our feelings, I swear-”
“No, no,” Impulse assures him, chuckling. “I really do like the ghost-hunting deal, don’t worry. But uh, we did deliberately ditch you guys in the hopes that something would happen.”
Scar waggles his eyebrows. “Oh, things happened, alright.”
“Scar!” Grian swats at him, but he’s laughing and it feels good. It feels right. After all this time spent worrying about worst-case scenarios, about denying his feelings for the sake of maintaining the comfortable mundanity of his comfortable life, it turns out the scariest part was the fear itself.
The irony doesn’t escape his notice. A bit on the nose, if he’s honest.
“But in even bigger news,” Impulse graciously continues, “you saw the ghost? And you believed it? You, Mr. Non-Believer in all things ghostly?”
Grian sighs. “Yeah, yeah, I know…”
“This is incredible!” Skizz claps his hands together. “Okay, okay, we gotta go cleanse the area and I wanna hear everything, got it? Don’t leave a single detail out!”
Grian slips his hand into Scar’s as they follow Impulse and Skizz back up the stairs. “Yeah, alright,” he relents. He supposes he’s due for a lot of ‘I told you so’s’. But really, it’s a small price to pay for the life-altering knowledge that ghosts are real… and for finally finding the courage to believe in something extraordinary.
Scar hums. “Wait, details about the ghost or about the kissing?”
“Scar!”
~*~
#hermitcraft#hermitshipping#scarian#my writing#listen i am only a casual phasmo enjoyer and idk anything about architecture school pls don't come for me abt any inaccuracies#just here for a good gay spooky time#wanted to see if i'd be any good at writing commissions (ie. solely based off someone else's idea) and i had FUN#but it's always easy to be inspired by mel <3
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My problem with Bat/ Bat ships isn't that they exist, it's how many people like them.
Wait! Hear me out. I swear I have a reason.
I'm good at ignoring ships that squick me, so I do. I also want to make it very clear I am not I am not hating on individuums who ship Bat/ Bat.
But to me, how much people ship them is kind of indicative of how little we value adopted children in our society. People say they aren't "really related" so it's fine.
Because you just don't see that level of engagement with ships involving biologically related family.
And it's that attitude shining through more than the shipping itself I dislike.
"Fiction isn't reality" no, it isn't, write the darkest thing you want. Explore fucked up concepts. That doesn't make you a bad person. It's completely normal.
However oftentimes Fiction is often still a reflection of reality. From reading, we can learn about our society (or other societies, if we venture beyond our own culture.) It says something, whether the author meant for it to mean something or not.
We understand where you're coming from and agree that adopted children/siblings are real family and shouldn't be valued less. We also agree that fiction mirrors reality which mirrors fiction, although that process is much more complex than many people claim.
However, 1) not every family is your typical nuclear family. Everybody defines their family and their relationships with its members in their own way. Some people call all adults that are close to them uncles and aunts, regardless of any actual biological connection. Someone could have been raised by their biological parents, but don't claim them as parents because of personal reasons and even view other adults who filled the parental roles better as their actual parents. Someone could have a biological sibling that is much older than them, grow up without them in their life and due to that think of them as more of a cool friend than a sibling. (All examples are taken from our own personal experiences.)
It's especially apparent in cases of found family, which batfamily certainly is. Tim and Jason haven't met until Jason was 18 and Tim was 16. Both were adopted by the same man, but they didn't know each other. Does that automatically makes them brothers? Even though without the adoption papers they would be total strangers? If Jason's death invalidated the adoption papers does it mean he and Bruce stopped thinking of each other as parent and child? Bruce and Dick have an age difference between 10 to 20 years and viewed each other more as brothers, partners and mentor/mentee at first. Bruce and Tim for a long time also thought of each other as mentor/mentee, especially since Tim still had a living father. That was also the case of Dick and Damian. Tim had a crush on Cass in the comics at the beginning of their friendship. Jason and Dick were technically brothers before Jason's death, but they weren't close at all and only met a few times. Barbara is a mother/sister figure to Cass even when she was dating Cass' adopted brother Dick. We don't think Jason and Cass even met once in post-crisis comics, despite technically being siblings. (Sorry we're only mentioning that one era, we aren't as knowledgeable about new52 and rebirth.)
The recent push to make the batfamily a nuclear family in our opinion does a huge disservice to the characters and their interesting and complicated relationships that can't fit neatly into boxes labeled "sibling" or "parent".
2) some people think of batfamily as a family AND still ship them at the same time. Yes, some claim they aren't "really related", but there's another side that absolutely views them as related and wants to explore what happens when two brothers or a father and son fall in love.
3) there's actually a pretty big engagement with ships involving biologically related family. Wincest (ship between biological brothers Sam and Dean from Supernatural) is the 15th most popular ship on AO3 of all time. We still remember how prominent the fandom discourse about shipping the Weasley twins from Harry Potter was. In almost every fandom, there're at least a few incest ships. Are they more popular than adopted sibling incest ships? We don't know, but if anyone wants to measure it in some way, we'd love to find out.
Edit: 4) as people have rightfully pointed out in the comments and reblogs, a lot of fics are AUs where one or both characters weren't even adopted and met in different circumstances. You can see that in a lot of fandoms, people will imagine close friends or even strangers as biological family and vice versa: write biological or adopted family as just friends or even strangers.
We're looking forward to hearing what other people think about this topic!
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Danganronpa V3 Animatic
Might finish it into a full animation (not anytime soon)
IT'S DONE, I'M SO EXCITED THAT I FINISHED IT AS FAST AS I CAN I felt like I was having a Danganronpa V3 open book exam as I kept rewatching certain scenes to figure out what to draw ejfnend
I once said that my dream is to make a long animation one day- I feel I'm one step closer to that dream! 🥺💖
I'm really happy with how this turned out, I'm posting to mark my improvement from Kaemugi animatic (which had too many close ups)
I've been studying animations I like and some anime scenes frame by frame to improve-
I'm not good at storyboarding, I actually tried and gave up- So I just jumped directly into making the animatic
I feel I planned really hard scenes to do for final as there are a lot of dynamic and perspective poses ekfjejd ESP THE FIGHT SCENE that part is my favourite wkfjd I RILLY LOVE ACTION IN ANIMES I didn't think I could pull it off, it looks really cool in the end! I feel I'm not able to do those hard poses now, but maybe in the future? >:3
Just gotta keep working hard and be patient and one day I'd reach my goal!
-
Ending: After getting crushed by a rock, Tsumugi reflects in her final moments about everything that happened
The mirror flashes back to her pregame self where she is forgotten by everyone for being too plain, all she has is Danganronpa to keep her going
It changes to Junko to show how Tsumugi was so lost in fiction that she copied Junko completely and forgot about herself
The mirror then changes to Tsumugi herself in her current state to show that Tsumugi finally accepts reality
The reality is she is herself and the fact that the killings were all real so she doesnt smile and dies together with her regret
^I know this is not a popular fandom view but if I'm going to pour my heart into something that could possibly take years to do, I'm going to do something that I truly want for myself and not just what is most popular and most welcomed I hope there will still be people who enjoy this though, thank you for all the support!🥰💖
-
Thoughts:
-I want Tsumugi to lipsync the lyrics "I designed this rhyme" as it feels fitting of her role, the mastermind
-Himiko pulling down her hat before revealing she is crying is to symbolise how much she had repressed her feelings till now
This was inspired by a Warrior Cats animation btw! It's called "Swiftpaw AMV - In The End" by NekoVocalNote
I came up with all the scenes in this animatic myself (which I'm proud of akdjdj) but I was inspired by that Swiftpaw animation's action and how one can finish a full animation- I used the same song as it! My final is a bit similar to the ending of the Swiftpaw animation too!
#danganronpa v3#kaede akamatsu#tsumugi shirogane#miu iruma#kokichi ouma#shuichi saihara#maki harukawa#angie yonaga#tenko chabashira#himiko yumeno#keebo#kaito momota#gonta gokuhara#korekiyo shinguji#ryoma hoshi#kirumi tojo#rantaro amami#my content
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Jhugas masterlist:🍀🪷🫧
Fun fact: All of my titles are a quotations from the story ^^
PLEASE ACKNOWLEDGE THAT :
These stories do not represent BTS at all ! The characters in the stories are not the same as the real persons. These are pure fictions with characters.
English is not my first language ^^
PS:
🪐: Angst | 🌺: Smut: MNDI | 🍃: Fluff | 🪨: Sad
✿✼:*゚:༅。.。༅:*・゚゚・⭑
BTS: 📹🍂🎞️📀
‘Brave one’: 🌺 - Jimin, Hoseok — Summary: During a dance practice, you and Hoseok were getting horny, but Jimin wasn’t going to let that happen without him. ~{1,5k}~
‘Trust me’: 🌺 - Jungkook, Hoseok, Yoongi — Summary: While watching a movie with Jungkook, Hoseok and Yoongi, things get more spicy than expected. ~{1,6k}~
‘Do it.’: 🌺 - any Bts member — Summary: you and your husband trying to have sex at his concert… and after. ~{1,6k}~
Kim Seokjin: 💜☂️👾
‘The moon watching over the sun’: 🍃 — Summary: You got your period last night and Jin, your husband, knows how much they hurt. So all day he’s going to take care of you ^^ ~{1k}~
Jung Hoseok:🌟✨🍌
‘Dirty whore’: 🌺 — Summary: you tease him while you’re eating food at a restaurant with your friends, who would’ve thought you’d be in the toilets doing it with him? ~{1,2k}~
‘I mean it’: 🍃 — Summary: You finally meet the guy you were talking with for a year. After two month meeting in real life, you go to the beach together with his friends. What do you think is going to happen? ~{1k}~
‘Just follow me’: 🌺 — Summary: You and your rival, Hoseok, have to make out in front of the paparazzis to make them believe you’re dating. How will this go? ~{1k}~
‘Look at me’: 🌺 — Summary: You have a bad habit of peeling the skin of your lips. He warns you then teases you until you finally get comfortable enough to have eye contact with him… After all of that? Isn’t he supposed to be just a friend? ~{1k}~
‘Relax baby’: 🌺 — Summary: after your friend Hoseok learns that you never had sex nor fingered, he decides to help you… ~{1,6k}~
‘Can we?’: 🌺 — Summary: Hoseok and you are practicing a duet, but when he learned that you were dancing with someone else the day before, he got jealous. ~{1,6k}~
‘Of Course Baby.’: 🌺🍃 — Summary: You needed him one last time before he left again.. ~{1,2k}~
Kim Namjoon:🎀🎟️🌷
‘C’mon baby, sit.’: 🌺 — Summary: Namjoon has always protected you since you were young… but now that you were older, he still protected you the same. But you, you wanted to prove him that you grew, and that this feeling that grew on you for him, wasn’t just childish love. ~{1,5k}~
Park Jimin:🍪🐣🌼
‘Silence spoke better than words’: 🍃 — Summary: Jimin, your childhood bestfriend and crush, has something in his mind at your birthday party. You decide to go up to him and have a nice conversation. But instead, something else occurs. ~{1,2k}~
‘Understand what?!’: 🪐🪨🍃 — Summary: You and Jimin start arguing about your break up, and he decided to clear few things up. ~{1,2k}~
‘Good night love’: 🍃 — Summary: Jimin is scared to confess his feelings for his dear bestfriend, you. Thankfully though, Yoongi will help him open himself. ~{1,5k}~
‘I’m not done with you…’: 🌺🪐 — Summary: Your argument was stupid and getting hurtful, so you expected a few things from Jimin, but not this… ~{1,9k}~
‘Film yourself for me.’: 🌺 — Summary: Your boyfriend misses you while he’s on tour, and he needed one thing from you… ~{1,5k}~
Kim Taehyung:🏮🍄🍓
‘That one night’: 🌺 — Summary: You and Taehyung got invited to the Celine after party on a public beach at night. As fans are watching and filming you two, you can’t stop each other from flirting, not knowing that things will get pretty… interesting. ~{1,3k}~
1st 200 notes <3
‘Right now?’: 🌺 — Summary: Taehyung and you get some fun on the balcony in the middle of nowhere…
Jeon Jungkook: 🌀🌊🐬
_MINI SERIES_
‘Prove it’: 🌺🪐
Masterpost
‘I don’t mind’: 🍃🪐
Prologue ~{700}~
Day one ~{1,6k}~
Summary: You went to a sport camp with a friend. But you didn’t know that you’ll not only be with her, but also your ex, Jungkook, and your bully, Suhyeok. In front of Suhyeok’s shitty behaviour towards you, how will Jungkook, that already hates him, react?
_ONE SHOTS/ DRABBLES_
‘I owe her my life’: 🍃🪐🪨 — Summary: You love Bts and Army, but you don’t think you’re made for this lifestyle, so you’ve been considering leaving the group. But how will Jungkook, the one that loves you the most, react? ~{1,2k}~
‘I want you…’: 🌺 — Summary: You and Jungkook are going to ‘Jack in the box’ release party. But you two being the freaks that you are, you won’t be able to go to the party without having sex… twice.~{1,7k}~
1st 300 —> 900 notes <3
‘Be a good girl’:🌺 — Summary: You decide to try cock warming while he plays a game, but it doesn’t go as planned… ~{1k}~
1st 1k-1.2k likes!!
‘I only want you’: 🍃 — Summary: Jungkook is scared of the moment you’ll get a boyfriend, he doesn’t want anyone to take his place and he tells you about it. ~{1k}~
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈ the type to…┈┈┈┈┈
YOONGI—The type in sex to: 🌺
NAMJOON—When you’re sad, scared, needy, and horny:🍃🌺
HOSEOK—Fluff headcannons: 🍃—The type of rich bf to: 🍃—The type in sex to: 🌺
JUNGKOOK—Fluff headcannons:🍃
✿✼:*゚:༅。.。༅:*・゚゚・⭑
Buy me a small coffee here to help me/ support me :)
Please do not steal, edit or translate my work. Reblogs, comments and likes are very much appreciated <3
Do not use AI to do anything with my works or create anything inspired by my works.
SHIPPERS GTFO
#bts#army#hoseok#jhope#hobi#fanfic#Jungkook#fluff#smut#masterlist#bts masterlist#jimin#Jin#seokjin#yoongi#angst#drabble#drabbles#scenarios#imagine#one shot#bts fanfic#bts smut
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If everyone called Adult Showrunners of Shows for Kids pedophiles just because their show for kids includes kids having crushes and getting together, there'd be no romance in kids' media at all. I think what bugs me the most about ZKs is the double standards and how much they'll be intellectually dishonest just to keep attempting to prove a point
"There'd be no romance in kids' media at all" that's actually something I've seen people push for. Like, they think that a fictional story acknowledging the fact that kids already know romance is a thing and that sometimes they have crushes on each other is the same as it sexualizing/grooming children, even if nothing even remotely sexual happens in said story.
It's basically the modern day version of the Hays Code imposing the stupid rule of "You can't show a married couple sharing a bed, even if they're literally just sleeping, fully clothed, not even touching each other, because acknowledging that married people share a bed is obscene because it subtly reminds people that sex is a thing."
And it is funny that zutarians often go "Aang being 12 makes the romance weird/inappropriate" or makes Bryke look "suspicious" for "forcing kids to kiss" multiple times when:
1 - The Kataang age-gap is the same as the Zutara age-gap.
2 - A 12-year-old having a crush on someone is the most normal thing ever.
3 - Plenty of them were Aang's exact age or even younger when they started crushing on Zuko/shipping Zutara.
4 - The overwhelming majority of them are now adults but they are still writting full on porn of Zutara, just like they were doing back in the day as pre-teens/teens.
It's pure "This harmless thing is now bad because I said so - but only when other people do it."
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Freesia, aster, crocus, cosmos, bluebell :)
1. What's the best compliment you've ever received? Who was it from?
2. Do you have any significant dreams you remember? What were they about?
3. Do you have any pets? If so, what are their names?
4. Do you have any fictional crushes on a TV, Movie, or storybook character? Who and why?
Gabriel
1. "The best compliment I received was when a friend told me I was great at looking into others feelings. He told me I'd do great if I were a therapist.. that's kind of why I started to pursue it in college."
2. "A dream? I can think of one but.. it's not one I like remembering. I still get nightmares about our parents."
3. "We didn't really have the money for one, unfortunately!"
4. "Hm.. that's a tough one. Actually, my sister and I have the same crush, so she'll tell you my answer."
Ariel
1. "It was while I was babysitting during college a month ago! The parents were so impressed with me with how I handled their kids. I just.. did what I saw our older brother doing! But it felt nice."
2. "...My parents. I still dream about them, if you can call them 'dreams'."
3. "Nah, we didn't have the money for one."
4. "Oh well, you see.. Gabriel and I share a crush. It's Sullivan from Monsters Inc."
"Hear us out. He's big, goofy and all around reliable. He's dependable and responsible and honestly would make a good parent."
"Yeah, exactly!"
Dogday
1. "It was from a kid in the Playcare.. while I was talking with him, he ended up telling me to wanted to be like me when he grew up; a responsible role model who looked after others. I may not be the real Dogday...but I sure felt like it at that moment. And thankfully, that kid ended up being adopted before the Hour of Joy."
2. "...A dream where there is nothing but red.. and I can only see his face.. but he's not alive.. he's unmoving.. as if someone took him away from me. Even if I hate him.. I still care.. to see that happen.. it hurts."
3. "I used to have a Cocker Spaniel named Cyrus. I wonder how he's doing."
4. "...Bowser. I won't go into detail."
Catnap
1. "It was from a girl in this very Playcare. She told me that despite how I looked, I was gentle and easy to talk to. It.. made me feel better. It's.. a shame she was adopted. I miss her."
2. "I dream of losing them.. my friends. Seeing their bodies lifeless on the floor. Including him.. I don't want that reality.. and I'm glad it was avoided. But it's still frightening to think about."
3. "I used to own an black cat named Luan.. it has been some years however. I don't know how he's been."
4. "...Hmmm.. well. Do Felix the Cat and Mickey Mouse count? If they do then.. I'm not going into detail."
#poppy playtime#poppy playtime au#twin angel au#ic#gabriel talks#ariel talks#dd barks#cn meows#THIS WAS SO LONG I HATE YOU/J#YOU'RE LUCKY I ALREADY ANSWERED FOR FREESIA OR I WOULDA DONE ONLY ONE PERSON/LH
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if mike and el stay together and byler isn’t endgame, the writers would be sending the most awful message.
firstly, a little girl escapes a lab she grew up in after being abused and traumatised, and starts dating the first person that shows her kindness after spending less than a week with him?? really? she gets kissed when she's 12 years old after a few days of knowing him when she can’t communicate at the same level as the other characters (there’s a line where lucas says mike’s 3 year old sister talks more and this was included to prove that el was definitely NOT ready to be shoved into a relationship) and she doesn’t even understand the concept of romance at all. she doesn’t even know who she is as an individual person (her likes, her dislikes, her fashion sense, her type when it comes to crushes, her favourite foods, how the world outside the lab works, literally nothing about herself at all) and she doesn't even know the meaning of the word "friend" and has to be taught what it means. yet she still gets forced into a romantic relationship with someone she didn’t even have time to develop a friendship with first while still basically being strangers? HOW is that healthy? how are people seriously okay with that?! (and before anyone starts, i’m NOT saying that she couldn’t eventually get into a relationship. of course she could. but it happened WAY too quickly when she wasn’t ready at all and people need to acknowledge this).
secondly, another abused and traumatised child is gay and in love with his best friend, and they’ve made him suffer the entire show while thinking he’ll never be loved back?? even when all the other kids were happy in season 3 and getting into romantic relationships, will didn’t have that. he got absolutely nothing, except being excluded and shoved to the side. what kind of message are they sending to only do this to the main gay character? why do all the other kids get to be happy and experience love? especially after how they included homophobic slurs in season 1 about will, it would be absolutely disgusting to leave him with unrequited love. gay people go through enough pain and suffering in real life, so why would anyone want to be reminded of that while watching a fictional show with a character that they relate to and find comfort in? shawn levy said their show is an anthem for the marginalised. how is making the gay kid suffer sending a good message for those who are outcasted and oppressed in society? it’s just hurting people. it’s making them think they’ll never find happiness and it’s also allowing the homophobes to win. it goes against everything this show has fought for and why it was created in the first place.
another thing that’s absolutely ridiculous is the massive difference between mike’s relationship with el vs his relationship with will. mike and el’s relationship lacks trust, honesty, communication and understanding, while mike and will’s relationship has all of those things and more. what kind of message are they sending if they keep mike and el together but keep mike and will apart? why are they telling people that it’s okay to stay in a relationship with extreme emotional attachment and codependency due to shared trauma when you don’t even feel like an equal to your partner? mike and el literally admitted they don’t feel like equals. they’re both insecure in this relationship and they feel inferior to each other. they’ve made each other feel like shit in every season (except s2 since they didn’t even see each other until the end). how is it okay to tell people to stay in a relationship like this?
and finally, why would the writers think it’s okay to use will as a plot device to force mike and el back together while he continues to suffer? mike is will’s best friend. he’s his safe place and the boy he loves most. and yet the writers have made will sit back and watch him with someone else while he suffers alone. they literally put him in almost every mike and el scene in season 4 just to rub it in even more. then they had the audacity to turn a very personal and meaningful scene that was supposed to be about mike and will ONLY and made it about el, because of course they did. it’s like mike and will can’t have anything for themselves anymore. will’s painting and his feelings for mike were something extremely personal and they made it about el in order to mislead mike and push him into telling her he loves her. it’s messed up on so many levels and i don’t understand how anyone thinks it’s okay.
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Feeling bored and unmotivated in posting stuff (and probably in a need for some interaction with fellow moots/followers). Saw a post on Twitter on everyone sharing their cartoon crushes. (In case you missed it!)
I decided to be brave and share my fictional crushes! 😖🫡 Feel free to either agree or roast me! (Civically of course!) I'd love to see others fictional crushes and gush over them as well! So don't be shy in sharing them under the replies!
So to first start off...
Him💜
The 1st pic and GIF of him always does something to me (My god...)
Yami Yugi/Atem (Yu-Gi-Oh! DM/DSOD) | Main Crush - My first anime fictional crush 💜✨🌟 (and still is to this day! And has been recently the cause for all those self ship/self insert reblog posts on my other blog, as embarrassing as it sounds....) This man has inadvertently popped back into my brain all of sudden and slowly got me back to hyper fixating on YGO, (in the year of our lord saviour 2024), specifically for him 💜! There's really a plethora of reasons why I enjoy and appreciate him as a character (ie his personality, aura, kindness, complexity and flaws as a character, his voice - both in English and Japanese 😳 etc. - if anyone's interested maybe I might make a seperate post about it and share my headcanons for him perhaps)
2. Seto Kaiba (Yu-Gi-Oh! DM/DSOD) - Do I really need to say anything? 🤷🏾♀️ Same reasons applied as Yami/Atem really! The guy’s iconic, what can I say?
3. Dartz (Yu-Gi-Oh! DM) - Unpopular opinion/hot take but I think he’s pretty underrated as a villain (fuck him for making Yami Yugi cry + manipulating him and everyone else - Affectionately?? Just so my words don’t get twisted out of context, I’m appreciating him as a villain/character here, so don’t get it twisted). Is the story a hit or a miss or is it necessary? Can’t really say for sure, sorry🤷🏾♀️.
It’s been a long time I watched YGO, so go easy on me and take it with a grain of salt. All I will say honestly, is that I really like his design, him as a character (I think there’s a lot of missed potential that could’ve been explored more) and his voice (English preferably, Wayne Grayson’s performance as Dartz really did it for me! No hate towards the Japanese VA/Dub, just a preference towards his eng voice)
4. Pantalone (Genshin Impact) - Okay, so here’s the thing with him…If I happen to come across a guy with this much drip, charm and mysterious aura, with glasses to boot than I’m already sold! I haven’t played much Genshin in a long time, so I’m not sure what role he plays into the story. (I’d love to hear your thoughts and theories, though no spoilers please! 😊)
I’ve only seen snippets of clips and fanart of him and the fatui from here and there, but I hope he’s playable in the near future.
If Arlecchino (Father - MORE LIKE DADD-), can become playable in the future, then so can he (among other fatui members, aside from Childe).
5. Boothill (Honkai Star Rail) - I don't know about you guys, but ever since he's been leaked (and now recently added to the game have seen his character trailer - the way he just sauves and moonwalked like the smooth criminal he is did it for me!) I just adore him - Design, personality, voice everything! I love me a spunky, sassy rootin tootin space ranger cowboy that loves to cause havoc and chaos! (and serves cun-) I just think he’s neat! (Also is it just me or does his theme song in the character trailer sounded something you would hear in a freakin Ford Truck Commercial, his theme screams pure “America. Freedom, F yeah!” Vibes. PLEASE TELL ME I’M NOT THE ONLY ONE THAT THINKS THIS?! I JUST FIND IT FUNNY TO ME)
6. Miguel O'Hara (Across The Spiderverse) - Haven’t seen the movie yet (dw I plan to watch it but PLEASE NO SPOILERS!) but this man is everywhere and I don’t blame you! I’ve seen fanart/edits of him (especially ones whenever they show his fangs 😳👀) and honestly it’s on me because I been rewatching ColeyDoesThings video on him and it immediately got me back to start watching the spider verse movies (it’s on my to do list) So thanks Coley! (You should go check out her YouTube videos on everything fandom related, it’s great!)
UPDATE: Got another honourable mention! ✨⭐️
7. Lycaon (Zenless Zone Zero) - I’ve recently started playing ZZZ and so far it’s pretty fun! I’ve seen so many clips and fanart of this dude it’s not even funny. He’s pretty cool and got a nice design and voice. And that’s all I’m gonna say. I think this video on Twitter should speak for itself:
#cosmic posts stuff#fictional characters#fictional character crush#fictional character crushes#self ship#self shipping#selfshipper (?)#yugioh#ygo dm#yugioh duel monsters#yugioh dsod#yami yugi#atem#yugioh atem#seto kaiba#dartz#dartz yugioh#pantalone#pantalone genshin#genshin impact#boothill#boothill honkai star rail#honkai star rail#miguel o'hara#miguel spiderverse#spider man: across the spider verse#across the spiderverse#zzz lycaon#zenless zone zero
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Fics With Titles That Start With I (3) Masterlist
part one, part two
i bloom just for you - gorgeousdan
Summary: dan and phil’s first dance at their wedding, as seen by cornelia
i come undone when you're gone (ao3) - heartbreakordeath
Summary: who knows what the future holds (i don't know)
don't matter if i got you, got you (i got you)
~bastille, 'future holds'
or: the US tour is over. it's time for dan to come home.
i could listen to you all night long (ao3) - overmyhead
Summary: The night before Dan gets on the train to Manchester for the first time.
I Dare You - fiction-phan
Summary: “I'm egging your house for a dare but your parent is a cop and they're yelling at me so I told them that you were my ex and you wronged me but now you're coming outside and please go along with this, I don't want to go to jail.”
I Don't Love You (ao3) - Raspberrysaxophone
Summary: Dan and Phil work in an office and are (unfortunately) sharing a desk. Phil is often away on business or working from home so they are never there at the same time. They both get frustrated with how the other one organises the shared space and tell each other that through notes
- or -
Dan and Phil hate each other, but soon Dan realises that he is developing a crush on him. What will a New York business trip (where they are sharing a room xxx) do to their relationship?
I know you, hands under my sweatshirt (ao3) - midorijpg
Summary: “How are you?”
It's with an undertone of fear that he dares ask that, as always, even if he knows that he’s lucky if Dan even decides to answer. And as he imagines, Dan just tilts his head, looking at him as if lost in thought, swinging the bottle with his hand before just resting it on the floor.
“Make room,” he just says.
“What?”
“I said, make room.”
or, something something about having bad days and growing up and realizing you don't (completely) fit in couches anymore.
I Like my Men How I Like my Gin and Tonic (ao3) - BREAD2000yeet
Summary: Dan gives a C- blowjob and an receives an A+ handjob emo boys kissing vibes they r in luvv
I Love You S’more - nebulous-frog
Summary: Dan and Phil had never had s'mores, and their American crew members decided that it was their duty to fix that. Phil makes some messes and Dan is FondTM.
I Needed You - placingglaciers
Summary: In which Dan and Phil meet each other again after so many years under the most unlikely circumstance.
I try to picture me without you but I can't (ao3) - solarpower21
Summary: After Dan's tragic death, Phil starts having a bunch of strange dreams where he is still alive. But are they really just dreams?
Or: Phil's soul consciousness can't cope with Dan's death, so he starts hopping between different universes, trying to look for him.
I’ll Fight for You - ineverhadmyinternetphase
Summary: Dan’s tired of the constant messages asking about him and Phil, tired of fielding questions, and he snaps and takes it out on Phil. But Phil isn’t going to give up on him.
"I'm a big fan of tops" (ao3) - Scuddleduck
Summary: Set immediately after filming the keep or yeet Phil's closet video.
Dan gets hot and bothered after watching Phil take his clothes off over and over again.
i’m electric, a romantic cliché (me and you were meant to be in love) (ao3) - nardfx
Summary: “i really don’t know if i can do this.”
“you can do this.”
“okay, but what happens when everyone’s eyes are on me and they all know all of my secrets?”
or
dan and phil go to prom
In another life you still would’ve turned my head (ao3) - natigail
Summary: Dan comes across old black and white photos of two queer men messing around, one playing with the other's hair, just like he did in a recent video with Phil. He gets caught up in the emotions that he would have fallen in love with Phil in any universe. He crawls into Phil's lap and tells him exactly that.
in this smoking chaos (ao3) - writingcollective
Summary: Dan bottoms for the first time, not being able to shut down his inner demons that whisper internalised homophobic thoughts into his ear. But Phil guides him through it, somehow.
It Hits Different (ao3) - danisnotinteresting
Summary: I really have no summary for now, just read the tags please
It’s All Fun and Games (Until You Get Blackmailed - doomedhowell
Summary: Dan and Phil are in a relationship, but everybody at school thinks they hate each other. In order to have a fun date night, Dan and Phil travel out of town so nobody recognizes them. They think they’re safe, but are they?
it's amazing that you care (ao3) - danhoweiis
Summary: phil is having one of his dizzy spells whilst dan is on tour in america
It’s Different in the Dark - howthemoonsuitsthenightsky
Summary: When a leaflet for a haunted house comes through the door, Phil really wants to go, but Dan is less keen.
It’s You, and Only You (ao3) - Liorisnotonfire
Summary: Dan and Phil are frum (religious) Jews who go to an LGBT Jewish Pesach (Passover) retreat and find moments of community after a year of lockdown due to Covid-19.
A fic about having a unique, delicate, and maybe uncertain religious and queer identity, but finding home in the person you love. Also about loneliness and confusion, and trying to make life better. Featuring the rare insecure Phil
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hi winnie :3 can you talk a bit abt your fic w yuuji and choso? hope youre well <3
Hi rin! I've been doing pretty well today, and hopefully you are too! Thanks for the ask! :)
So for the Choso and Yuuji fic, that's tentatively titled There's a Place for You, it takes place post-canon. I came up with this idea way before what happened in canon with Choso, so I might have to change some things around. Well, I guess I can just make it canon divergent or an AU where Choso lives. (yap session incoming lol)
Anyway, the general idea for this fic is that some time has passed after the battle against Sukuna, and Tokyo is being repaired, Choso and Yuuji have the opportunity to bond as a family. Every chapter would be a stand-alone scene, but they're all connected in the way of family bonding as the central idea.
I originally had something more lighthearted and silly in mind, like maybe Yuuji would teach Choso about modern-day technology, but I thought, wait, NO, Choso does have some basic knowledge about the modern world because of his vessel (according to the official guide book).
I think that's something that gets overlooked by much of the fandom, that not only does Choso have a vessel of a 20-something year old man because of Mahito and Kenjaku, but he has also retained some of the knowledge from his vessel. So, he probably would know what a cell phone is and how to use it, etc. Personally, I find the characterization of a Choso who has no knowledge of the modern world and acts all dumb to be infantilizing and just plain wrong.
And with that in mind, I shifted the whole premise of the fic to something where Choso would need to contend with the reality of Mahito having taken his soul and putting it inside the body of an innocent man and made him his vessel. So, him and Yuuji would have a conversation about what it's like for one of them to be a vessel and the other to have a vessel, like being on opposite sides of the same coin or something. I also wanted to include a scene where someone refers to Choso as "Kamo" and it's my headcanon that Choso would despise using that name for himself because of the negative association it has with his father and everything he did to his mother and his brothers. Like, he hates that man and wants nothing to do with him. (Yeah I know it was technically Kenjaku in old Kamo's body, but still.)
But, I still wanted to include a few fluff moments, too, like there's a scene where they're watching a Human Earthworm movie, and Choso says that Yuuji acts kinda like the protagonist of the movie because he also has a crush on his friend. (just my way of inserting a little ItaFushi hehe)
There's a Choso Week event on twt next month that I wanted to participate in, so I could write one chapter of this fic as my entry, but I don't know if I'll be able to write it in time for the event, so I'm sharing my idea for the fic here!
Choso is one of my most beloved characters in all of fiction, and I just wanted to maybe have a chance to show my appreciation for him.
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4 7 9 16 33 :)
there's a lot here so i've put a read more:)
4) What is your favourite book?
I don't think the answer to this question is meant to be like. The Global Cold War by Odd Arne Westad or my current read which is The War of Nerves by Martin Sixsmith. However i am a history and politics student with interest in the cold war so. hahaha.
in terms of fiction i do Not read enough fiction (basically none, my friend on storygraph despairs). i think i like different books for what they meant to me at different times so for example i feel strongly about felix ever after because that book when i read it in year 11? 12? it meant a lot at the time even if i don't necessarily feel the same at all now. or for example the land of stories series by chris colfer was my childhood series and i still Love those books so much.
7) 5 female celebrity crushes.
only 5. okay. uhm.
hayley williams (especially her new haircut oml).
stella rose.
a newer one that was started by watching love lies bleeding in cinema but katy o'brian.
And again short hair kristen stewart omg.
and then most recent i think is simone ashley.
9) What do you consider your biggest accomplishments?
despite it literally Not being my biggest accomplishment the first one that always comes to mind is when i was 11 so a whole 8 years ago despite never having had music theory training or lessons and being seen as bad at music the subject i got the top mark in the class for a music theory test, only getting 3 answers wrong.
genuinely though i think its getting through sixth form. it was such. a time. a lot happened and yeah. i was also so close to dropping out Numerous times. there was just a Lot. i'm happy i stuck with it though and eventhough i am Not doing what i thought i would be or wanted to im really happy that it worked out the way it did because the friends i have and people i know now. bit sappy i know.
16) What do you think makes you attractive?
i did read for a second read this as almost like a make a business pitch and that made me laugh. this is a tough one. i guess you have kind of physically attractive and then the kind of personality and that side of it?
i literally do not know what i look like and struggle with looks but i've always liked my eyes. i think if we were to go for both sides thats what i would put for that? i also love my hair at the moment thank you to my old housemate who cut it.
idk for personality. i would like to say i'm a good person with amazing music taste😭😭. feels like i'm being a bit egotistical there. idk. i guess one trait i've been told is good about me (which i've had some people—my mum— say is bad) is that i care so deeply and am passionate about things. i very rarely feel completely neutral or only slightly one way.
33) What is a pet peeve that you have?
people not being polite to workers. i think that's quite standard though. maybe i should say the harmonica as my biggest pet peeve instead to shake it up a little. thank you guy who lived in the room next door to me. how the 24/7 harmonica wasn't the worst thing you did truly outstands me.
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i love your art and OCs but thank you for all the fan content! cant wait til i read Locked Tomb and finally understand it! (genuine) (this shit is hilarious)(im sure it will be more unhinged in retrospect)(originally followed for overwatch but im not complaining)
OH my god thank you so much!! lmao,i can't BELIEVE the amount of people who tell me they dont know what tlt is but enjoy my comics cuz like, i promise you other then the modern AU stuff i at least TRY to keep my goofs semi in character and a lot of my ideas are based on stuff that happen in the books so a lot of the jokes do need that bit of context, but im glad that they seem to be funnyish without it as well haha im happy to hear you liked my work enough to stick around!
and here is where i will put my formal apology to people who followed me for overwatch stuff only for me to hard flip into TLT and never look back, i could write a small book about my problems with OW and how much blizzard dropped the ball over and over again with it, i did TRY to keep making OW stuff and TLT stuff at the same time but maaan making overwatch fanart just feels like making content for a franchise that doesn't deserve my attention anymore, i do feel really lame having to say that cuz i do still love so much about it and brig is for sure still in my top 3 fictional crushes lol but GOD is it so hard trying to care about OW after all the shit that has happened to it last year alone, i still follow the news and play the game sometimes with my sister and i hope things improve but after them laying off all those talented artists i'm not holding my breath about it
#ask#RANTING SORRY FOR RANTING ON YOUR ASK SORRY#i always feel so silly typing up my opinion about something like that cuz like girl aint nobody care about what i have to say it LMAO#thank you for reading if you did teehee#my enjoyment for OW died when#i was playing a hide and seek custom game and somebody hoped in mic to tell me my hiding spot was shit#LIKE buddy im sorry if your taking hide and seek this serious i dont know what to tell ya#also i cant put on my lesbian player card without being hard targeted in every game i play :[#OW is a game where you have less fun playing it the better you get at it tbh
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MID YEAR BOOK FREAKOUT TAG
tagged by @its-tea-time-darling 💜💜💜
1. Best book you've read so far in 2024
so let them burn by kamilah cole
it's a jamaican-inspired fantasy following two girls: the chosen one and her older sister. except five years have passed since they helped liberate their country from oppression and it's turned out that the aftermath of war and child soliders and teen queens isn't quite so simple to navigate after all. then the chosen one's sister forms an unprecedented soul bond with a dragon and dragon-rider belonging to their old oppressors. the chosen one's gods tell her the only way to keep her people safe is to kill her sister, but both sisters care about each other way too much for killing each other to be an option.
if you like: siblings who'd burn the world for each other, dragons, soulmates who hear each other's thoughts, possession, gods who do not understand humans to the point that it causes Big Problems for everybody, and stories that explore what happens to the chosen one after the story is done, then you might like this book as well! also both sisters are queer (one is a lesbian and one is demi) so if you're looking for more queer books to read that aren't the same handful that always get rec'd first then here's one <3
2. Best sequel you've read so far in 2024
does the sunshine court count as a sequel? i'm gonna count it. that one. it's probably not Technically the best sequel i've read but it's added to the aftg brainworms that i've had for many years so
3. New release you haven't read yet but want to
dear wendy by ann zhao (two aroace uni students are enemies online due to their rival dating advice columns while becoming besties irl) and road to ruin by hana lee (bisexual polyamorous mad max fury road which also happens to have been written by a twitter mutual of mine)
4. Most anticipated release for the second half of the year
compound fracture by andrew joseph white!!! which i have an e-arc of and will be the next thing i read because i've delayed enough already
5. Biggest disappointment
wranglestone i had such high hopes for you but i have ended up with NOTHING nice to say except that the cover is pretty. don't read this book it's so terrible in every way and everyone involved in shortlisting it for an award should be ashamed of themselves
6. Biggest surprise
i've had the abyss surrounds us by emily skrutskie (and its sequel) sitting on my shelf for literal years and i finally picked them up a couple of months ago and they were excellent??? like it turns out they weren't getting hyped on booktube ~2017 just because they were sapphic ya sci-fi at a time when there was very little of that, but because they're also genuinely very very good, which was definitely a surprise to me. i was expecting to like them well enough, not to love them like i ended up!!
7. Favourite new author (debut or new to you)
i've read all three of zoe hana mikuta's books this year so let's go with her jksdfhgk her books are very cool, though the prose is often unnecessarily dense (she loooves her purple prose) which can make it a little hard to understand what's actually happening (which she leans into hard in her wonderland reimagining, to the point of near-incomprehensibility, which she gets away with solely because it's wonderland), but that clearly didn't annoy me too much seeing as i still read all her books lmao. something i really like about her books is the way that she centres platonic relationships and platonic love just as much as she does romantic relationships and romantic love, and also isn't afraid of letting the platonic relationships be just as toxic and fucked up as the romantic ones can be
8. Newest fictional crush
i don't get crushes on fictional characters
9. Newest favourite character
if i solely look at books i haven't mentioned yet, i also read interview with the vampire for the first time this year (i will get to the show At Some Point) and how anyone can read that book and not come away from it having a lot of Thoughts and Feelings about claudia i do not know
10. Book that made you cry
none, but i don't cry very easily
11. Book that made you happy
the garlic duology by bree paulsen!! they're cosy fantasy middle grade graphic novels about garlic, one of many vegetables that have been brought to life by a small town witch to help tend her garden, and how her life changes when a vampire moves in to a nearby empty castle
12. Favourite book to film adaptation that you've seen this year
my mother is OBSESSED with bullet train, and i do really like it as well, so whenever we're in the same place we tend to end up rewatching it. it slaps. don't watch it if you can't handle bloody scenes, death, or the threatened death of a child, but if you can handle those things then i very strongly recommend it
13. Most beautiful book you've bought so far this year (or received)
sigh. wranglestone. though tbf some of the fairyloot books i got this year before i cancelled my subscription are gorgeous too
14. What books do you need to read by the end of the year
compound fracture for sure!!!!!! then i just really need to make some kind of a dent in my unread e-arc collection lmao
15. How many new books have you read so far
according to goodreads i have read 48 books so far in 2024
i'm gonna tag @itsthemxze even though tea tagged you already (ha get double tagged), @fili-is-gone, and anyone else who wants to do this!!
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I think the most aggravating thing about the Michaela situation is that Jess Bronwell did that genderbend to appease HERSELF. She's so utterly vile and selfish its insane. She ruined a story. She took away the opportunity from a dark skinned black man to play someone that everyone in the ton (even his own SILs) deem as handsome and crush-worthy but at the same time isn't a shallow person but one dealing with a lot of internal vulnerability and guilt. That sort of layered story, she STOLE that from a black man and not only that but she made sure John, Fran's other dark skinned love interest was done dirty too with the implication she doesn't actually romantically love him. That's not even getting into the amount of people who feel they are being cheated representation through seeing Francesca's infertility and grief/finding love again storyline. Things that media doesn't tackle with nuance or commonly at all. That said, I doubt Jess would ever have given Francesca's story the depth it deserved either way. Requires too much nuance she doesn't possess.
Then as other anon mentioned: casting Masali SIX YEARS in advance. Flying her out from South Africa. All the absolute STUPID decisions they made to make SURE Jess' fanfiction became canon: all to avoid making Sophie a black woman? And now Masali will have to deal with the ire from fans who are rightfully mad? That said most Franchael fans have been heartbroken yet really respectful about Masali which is more than I can say about Jess Bronwell's fans who have been lapping up this change and acting as if their beloved male characters weren't problematic and that Michael in the books was a misogynistic demon and his fans are homophobes in denial. Like pls. They also keep bringing up the "he was a colonizer" and as a brown woman I have to absolutely LAUGH at that. This is fiction. Michael Stirling isn't real and isn't actively colonizing the subcontinent just like racism has magically disappeared in regency England. Retconning what he was doing the years he was avoiding Francesca is far easier than gender bending the whole goddamn character. He could have been off traveling on a grief sabbatical or whatever but acting like they changed him because he was any more problematic than Anthony or Benedict or Colin is laughable. And its usually fans of those 3 who are yapping too. I wonder how they'd feel if these 3 male characters had been swapped into women?
And you know what im concerned about? They still haven't mentioned who's season is next. Benedict meets the lady in silver at the masquerade. But it takes him some good long while (2 years?) to meet Sophie/find her. So either they're gonna avoid the time skip entirely... or they're actually doing the insane thing of making Francesca's story next because Jess Bronwell has no guarantee she'll even get to tell her self insert fanfic otherwise. I'm not sure. The hints were very strong about Benedict being next season. And if Shondaland wants Bridgerton to get renewed they'll have to bring the numbers next season which means Benedict. Francesca certainly won't bring those views especially not after pissing off book fans. But also I don't trust how off the rails the plan for this show has gotten.
Chris Van Dusen had his problems but at least he never would have pulled this shit. Its clear to me that Jess is both pandering to fans with the Benedict being pan storyline and also pandering to her own self insert fantasies with genderbending Michael. I'm utterly disgusted with her and Shonda. I'm also shocked the publisher for Julia Quinn's books even let this happen considering the sale money they make with tie ins too. If nothing else, I believed this mess wouldn't happen because it would impact that symbiotic relationship between streamer and publisher.
Everyone angry about this change has every right to be and its so so valid. Idc what the "popular" opinion is. Its a very narrow-minded self serving take and celebration for those (usually white) people who are excited about this.
Everything you said 👏🏽I really can’t express enough how shocked and utterly disgusted I am by everything. Honestly all I can say is that if anyone is unhappy with this bs fanfiction, don’t give them views next season. It’s not even a fun watch anymore.
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13 Books
What’s up readers?! How about a little show and tell? Answer these 13 questions, tag 13 lucky readers and if you’re feeling extra bookish add a shelfie! Let’s Go!
Not tagged by @softest-punk but I saw it on their page and decided to get involved.
1) The Last book I read:
Just finished Tana French’s “Broken Harbour”. I LOVE Tana French, particularly her Dublin Murder Squad series. I wasn’t very satisfied with the ending. It required too much suspended disbelief for me. Too many characters descending into madness at the same time very conveniently. But it was interesting to consider how many issues we cause for ourselves by attempting to be someone we think we should be.
2) A book I recommend:
Not to be basic Tumblr bitch but Neil Gaiman’s “The Ocean at The End of The Lane”. The way he can articulate the terrible things that happen in childhood, how we deal with them, how we carry the memories, and the effect they have on us for the rest of our lives left me shaken and breathless. ”You don’t pass or fail at being a person, dear.” I wish I didn’t need this reminder but I do, so thank you, Neil.
Plus, I find it fascinating to see the difference between people who can intimately relate to it and those for whom it is just a story.
3) A book that I couldn’t put down:
Stephen King “The Waste Lands” The third book of The Dark Tower series. A book series that started out so promising and ended with me throwing the final book against the wall in disgust and cursing Mr. King to high heavens. For all the issues the final books in the series had “The Waste Lands” was an absolute masterpiece. I remember reading it on a train to work and nearly missing my spot because I needed to find out what happens next.
4) A book I’ve read twice (or more):
One book?? Right. Stephen King’s “Salem’s Lot”. It absolutely terrified me when I read it as a teenager. I loved the feeling of small town America invaded by the supernatural which he writes so well. Plus, vampires! I have a habit of re-reading it every time I go home, don’t really know why. I probably should get around to reading it in English at some point.
Sometimes I re-read books by accident. I consume so much crime fiction that occasionally I will pick up a book from the library and happily read it with no recollection of the plot only to be told by GoodReads I’ve read it years ago.
5) A book on my TBR:
I am beginning to think this list was made by someone who isn’t a reader. One book? I guess it has to be R.F.Kuang “Babel”. I really want to read it. It's like The Secret History but in Oxford! I know I will enjoy it but I only have it on Kindle. I prefer reading long books in their physical form but the library copy is in hardback so it’s cumbersome to carry around. Thus it stays on my TBR.
First world problems of a bookworm.
6) A book I’ve put down:
Dan Brown “Angels and Demons”. I knew about his reputation when I picked it up, but I wanted something mindless to read and thought it would be fine. Reader, it wasn’t fine. Terrible, terrible writing. I couldn’t deal. Turns out I do have standards even for my trash reads.
7) A book on my wish list:
Stephanie Foo “What My Bones Know: A memoir of healing from complex trauma” I’ve read so many books on trauma and complex trauma both for my degree and for personal understanding. Surprising no one most of them are written by men. I’m very excited to read female perspective on it, plus she talks about generational trauma which is such an incredibly fascinating topic.
8) A favorite book from childhood:
Alexander Dumas “The Three Musketeers”. I was obsessed with this book. OBSESSED. I’ve read it so many times I could recite pages of it. It introduced me to my first problematic fictional crush Athos, starting my love affair with all the sad tortured blorbos which going strong till this day. I named my dog Count de la Fere after him. I wanted to be a musketeer so bad. Still kind of do.
9) A book you would give to a friend:
It does slightly depend on a friend but Amor Towles “A Gentleman in Moscow”. I was so blown away when I read it. I gave copies to my friends. I talked to everyone about it: friends, people on the internet, strangers in bookshops or on public transport (In London! Imagine the horror!) One of my friends refuses to read the last chapter till this day because she does not want the story to end. This is probably my proudest book gifting achievement.
10) A book of poetry or lyrics that you own
The OG problematic bae Lord Byron Selected Works. It’s a second hand school library's copy from 1950’s full of underlinings and scribbled notes. I love seeing evidence of other people engaging with writing and thinking about words.
Such a problematic person. Such a great poet.
11) A nonfiction book you own:
Cindy Crab “Things That Help: Healing our lives through Feminism, Anarchism, Punk & Adventure”. I found this book in the feminist bookshop in Brighton when things weren’t going so great for me for the umptheen time and it was like pouring healing salve on my soul. It’s not a book in a traditional sense but a collection of self-published zines collected into a little tome. It destroyed my very conservative idea of what a book is and how “professional” it should look that I did not realise I held until that moment. Most importantly, it reminded me there are other ways of being in the world that a conventional way of living.
12) What are you currently reading:
Teo van den Broeke “The Closet”. It’s a memoir of a fashion journalist who tells of growing up, coming out and figuring out himself through clothes that were important to him. It’s written in an easy, conversational style. As someone whose wardrobe consists of jeans, leggings and t-shirts I find it so interesting to peek into fashionista’s world.
13) What are you planning on reading next?
Isabella Hammad “Enter Ghost”. It is a book set in Palestine about staging Hamlet and possibly also a queer love story. What more could you want from a book? Cannot wait to start this one!!
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